Tuesday, 26 April 2016

I am Ok : You are not Ok!!!

I am sure you would have encountered umpteen number of times the experience of “I am Ok you are not Ok” behavior at your corporate life or personal life or both. Most of us have this feeling when it comes to managing and dealing with our Boss. Did I hear someone saying spouse……hmnnnn well let’s not go there as I am not an expert to comment on that area!

Come back, when was the last time you felt terribly awfully disturbed? What disturbed you? What were the causes? What happened and how did you feel and react? The bigger question for you to ponder is you able to critically differentiate between; where you in the mind frame of “Somebody disturbing me” or “I am disturbed”?

That somebody could be job, work, career, boss, subordinate, customer, vendor, lack of freedom, heath, studies, situation, etc. The trick is not to get trapped in the negative emotions and look externally outwards for your disturbances. 

STOP and get out of your ‘BED’ - the ‘B’lame game, ‘E’xcuse syndrome and ‘D’enial mode. The more you start taking action externally to dispel the disturbances it will cause more disturbance. Funny, but that’s the reality.  

START working on the mindset that I am disturbed and internalize it by acknowledging, accepting and taking 100% ownership. Recognize the current reality graciously that “I am disturbed” and be committed to make a change. Daily spend some time for greater depths of silence for you to deeply reflect. Slowly and gradually Lo behold you would experience the shift from “I am disturbed” state to “I am ok” and I am ok with the person and situation that’s causing you disturbance. The turmoil in your mind disappears by itself.

Try practising empathy and sharpen your emotional intelligence skills.